I wonder what it would be like if there were no external influences on an individual’s sexuality. What if there were no religions or societal doctrines dictating who a person can have sex with, how often a person can enjoy sex, or what sexual acts are acceptable.
I’m thinking the vast majority of the population would probably be bisexual.
Even when applying this theory to myself, I’m pretty confident I would still be happily* married to my wife. However, I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be uncommon for me to get a handy from some random dude that’s a friend-of-a-friend in a walk-in closet on New Years Eve, or in a handicapped bathroom stall at Chili’s.
Yup, that would be awful.
* Nobody has been poisoned, yet.
Those other guys did a serviceable job but they didn’t have that special something.
I even have the Startup Disk. I feel like I just won the lottery or had my first orgasm that was not self-induced.
I grew up on Pac Man and Donkey Kong…
One of my favorite Tumblr followers asked a good question. This question was related to my food journaling posts, as opposed to my startlingly, insightful ‘Trailer Park Boys’ posts. I answered him privately but I’m going to go ahead and also answer it publicly in case anyone else was curious.
His question was: What is your current physical shape?
Well, my current physical shape can be best described as gelatinous. I had gained 60 pounds in a fairly short period of time when I took that vague-looking pic I use for my Tumblr profile. I’ve gained another 80 pounds since then. I’m a morbidly, obese mess.
If anyone is interested in getting a better idea of what I look like, I posted a couple of videos which can be found at the beginning of my archive. They were made when I first created this Tumblr, also around the time I took that Tumblr pic. I don’t foresee posting any other pics or videos anytime soon. I’m just not in a good place with my appearance.
However, I hope you all are doing well. I can see from my dash that many of you are. This is a source of happiness and hope for me.
Less than 3 years ago, I was actually in excellent shape. Before work, I’d run 4 miles in 30 minutes and would lift weights like a juice-head. During the day I would only eat low-fat proteins, fruits, and other healthy crap… but I was always looking forward. I was always looking forward to the binge. I was never sure when it would take place or what the occasion would be, but I was also consciously counting down to it. A deeper part of me was also counting down to when all my healthy ways would crumble into dust. I knew it was coming.
Today I felt that similar anticipation for the binge. I work from home on Wednesdays so it’s usually a test of will for me NOT to binge. I completely waived that test today. After I dropped my kid off at school, I swung by the always-sanitary Food Lion and picked up some pepper-jack cheese, roast beef, potato salad, FAMILY-SIZE tortilla chips, jalapeno ranch dip, and couple of bags of ‘fun-size’ Butterfingers and Baby Ruths. In short, I had a 40 minute food orgy from 11am to 11:40:
I never got around to the chips and dip; I’ll probably pounce on those after I write this.
Once again, there was no point this morning which I was hungry. I just needed the junk. I had to have the taste but I barely even remembered the taste minutes after the gorge.
I spent the next 4 hours completely bloated and uncomfortable. I actually had to go see my psychiatrist at 12:40 and she, of course, had to put me right on the scale to see how I was doing. Let’s just say I was DOING GREAT!!!!
Later in the evening, I was still not hungry but I sat down and ate a bit with the family:
My wife was probably impressed with my restraint. I haven’t been sharing my recent food problems with her lately, but she knows I’m a binger. She just doesn’t know when I do it, or maybe she does. She probably does.
At least the Orioles are playing well. Maybe Caps will eliminate the Bruins tonight.
“Tick-Tock goes the Shit-Clock, Ricky…”